Wishing

                Do you ever find yourself wishing to be someone else? Have you ever wished that your life was more like the life of that really skinny girl who just seems to have it all? I think the better question would be, who doesn’t?

                So often we find ourselves looking at the people around us and wishing to be them. I remember when I was twelve years old my dad’s best friend gave me a necklace for Christmas. It was a cute little necklace with a metal peace sign pendant surrounded by little orbs of quartz. I still have it to this day actually. It came with a tiny note from the maker of the necklace that claimed to “make all of your wishes come true”. I was ecstatic! Though my dad’s friend laughed it off, all I could think was how great my life would become. Mind you I was twelve. I am very much aware that a necklace has no power over the universe. I’m pretty sure I knew that at twelve as well, but that didn’t stop me from wearing it every day. Whenever something bad would happen I would wish for a change. Whenever a prettier girl walked by me I would wish to look more like her. I would wish for clothes, money, fame, and even talents I did not possess. I don’t think I actually thought these things would happen, but maybe a part of me wished they would.

                I’m still the very same way. I don’t wear the necklace everyday anymore, but I’m constantly wishing to be someone else or have something I don’t. I am that person that makes a wish everyday at 11:11. Why? I live a great life; I have a roof over my head, food in my stomach, two loving parents, good grades, and the best friends in the entire world, so why do I wish for it to be different? Why am I unsatisfied?

                I like to think I’m not the only one like this. I think we all have moments when we feel like we need more. That being skinny is what we want, that having tons of money will fix every problem, that having that overpriced name brand dress will make us more popular. We long for what we cannot have and it’s a constant battle in my life. A battle for my happiness. These wishes are for things that I think will make me happy, when really I have everything I’ll ever need already.

                I’m trying to change though. Every morning I wake up and I list five things in my life I’m thankful for. As I get dressed I remind myself that my sense of style is what makes me unique and I don’t need a size two waist to be beautiful. Then, in the wise words of Macklemore, I remind myself that I don’t need a name brand to be happy. “I wear your granddad's clothes, I look incredible.”

                Soon, I hope to be able to say that the only thing I wish for is the happiness off others. Fingers crossed!